Family days out are meant to be about smiles, laughter and creating lasting happy memories. We definitely have days which involved those things but in my experience as mum to an autistic child that often wasn't the case if we tried to go to busy, exciting typical family attractions. They were just 'too much'. I tried when Rex was young but it was always an exhausting stressful experience for everyone involved. So after a few failed attempts I simply stopped trying. They're expensive and as a single mum on a tight budget the prospect of spending a large
amount of my monthly disposable income on a day out that, judging by past experience, was likely to go awry and end up in child and adult tears just wasn't worth it. So for lots of Rex's life I have simply avoided all the big family theme parks, events, days out etc. However, last year a trip to LegoLand challenged my assumption that these things 'just aren't for us'. It turns out with a few adaptions they might be for us afterall. I should, with the benefit of hindsight, have kept trying these days out occasionally over the years as both Rex and I have changed (specifically my awareness of Rex's needs and how to accommodate them) and we might well have found a way to enjoy them sooner. So I've written this post for two reasons. The first to help anyone planning a trip to LegoLand Windor in the Covid19 context (our third and recent visit). The second in in the hope it could encourage other families with neuro-diverse children who might also be avoiding these days out to give them another try. With the right preparation and attitude on the day they can be a positive experience for everyone.
The first (disastrous) visit
The first time we went to LegoLand Rex was four and it was an unmitigated disaster. Honestly, it was awful. One of my worst days as a parent. We went with my brother, his wife and their two boys (3 and 5). We didn’t know Rex was autistic then so we made no special attempts to prepare him and on the day all three children were treated the same. It didn’t go well… Rex caused many mini (and some major) upsets everywhere we went. He screamed to get off rides mid-way, he shouted at the ride staff, he got frustrated and upset in the (very long) queues, he hit/bit me, tried to hit his cousins and ran away at every opportunity... In hindsight it must have been horrendous for him, a sensory processing nightmare, but I didn't know that and he was too young to explain. So he had an awful day and I faced what felt like constant judgement from the other visitors and staff. I cried on the way home and was adamant I was never putting us in that position again. We were never going back to LegoLand (or indeed to any theme park) ever again. Perhaps unsurprisingly I don't have even one photo from this 'family day out'.
The second attempt in Summer 2019 That complete refusal to engage with big theme parks or similar days out lasted four years, until Rex (8) was Lego obsessed and desperate to go to LegoLand having heard about it from a classmate and having completely forgotten everything from the first visit it would seem. So his Godmother and I decided to take him in summer 2019. I was fully braced for it to be a nightmare but it was BRILLIANT! One of the best days out together we’d ever had. Top tip - take someone like Rex's Godmother with you! Someone who is patient and calm and knows you inside out.
LegoLand is really accommodating of ASD and other hidden disabilities. Carers tickets are free if you meet the fairly typical 'disabled' (I use '' as I don't think of Rex as disabled just having different needs sometimes) criteria and can provide documentation (DLA letter, blue badge etc). Sunflower lanyards are used and recognised here (although I forgot Rex's - doh). The only real frustration of the day was having to queue for 50minutes for the Ride Access Pass (more details on the Pass below). It was obvious looking around the queue there were some very wound up children on the edge of melting down; ironic the wait was so long (and in full sun) when a ride pass is for children who are unable to queue as well as their peers... So not a nice start to the day but, having said that, significantly better than repeating that queue experience for every ride! We only went on five rides, but that was fine by us. There was lots to look at as you walk around and Miniland, which has cities and sights from around the world built out of Lego, is great. We loved the moving trains, buses, boats etc. The abundance of plants and greenery helps reduce the feeling of being crowded but it was still undeniably very busy in some areas.
Visiting during Covid (our third and recent visit)
Having been promised a ‘proper’ birthday party this year (because he didn’t have a party at all last year) I thought Rex would be really upset at Covid19 making that impossible, but he was wasn’t. He was clearly disappointed but said he understood. He accepted the prospect of no big birthday celebration with remarkable maturity for a nine year old. So when August came and he asked if we could go to LegoLand because he wasn't having a party it didn’t seem an unreasonable request. He didn’t even ask about bringing a friend or meeting his cousins there. We’d been taking self-isolation seriously and even when lock down finished we’d only gone out to the park, local food shop and he'd done a few hours at school. So I felt slightly uncomfortable with a full day out and I wasn’t sure Rex would like the changes Covid19 had brought to LegoLand. But despite these reservations I eventually agreed and I'm so glad I did! All the things you need to know about LegoLand at the moment in the Covid context below:
Covid19 safety measures:
I imagine LegoLand's Covid19 safety measures will evolve and change over the coming weeks and months but what we saw showed the park is clearly making a big effort to impose safety restrictions and in most instances it feels like its effective. Numbers in the restaurants and shops were restricted, all staff were wearing masks even those outside, queues had distance markers on the floor, rides were cleaned regularly, some rides had reduced numbers to allow for social distancing, and in some enclosed locations and rides there are rules in place regarding adult visitors wearing masks. We witnessed staff on several occasions enforcing these rules (it’s amazing how many visitors seemed to be annoyed at having to take what are now pretty standard safety measures.) I don’t know if the park has reduced the overall number of visitors per day but the week day we went it was definitely much quieter than last summer. I hope they have and its like this every day as with all the extra cleaning and reduced ride occupancy if the park was letting in its usual number of visitors it would be really slow getting on rides. Overall the staff are doing lots to encourage social distancing….but inevitably you do end up in close proximity to people. The one-way systems throughout the park were completely ignored by almost all visitors and there were crowded congested spots.
The Ride Access Pass:
This is SO important to our day being successful (I wouldn’t go without one) so several bullets to cover it:
The criteria - Be aware Lego Land has either changed its criteria or at least they are enforcing it differently to last year. Last year I brought Rex’s DLA letter on the day and that was sufficient. This year because of Covid all entrance tickets have to be booked in advance and they are doing the same with Ride Access Passes. There are various forms of evidence you can produce for the Ride Pass but perhaps the easier one for children is a DLA letter showing high-level mobility. Rex has mid-level mobility so my initial application was rejected. To be fair to LegoLand it does state this clearly on their website, I just hadn’t read the small print as we’d been previously so I assumed it would be the same this year. It would be helpful if they had flagged this change somewhere on the entrance tickets page so parents could know to check their child is still eligible before paying for tickets. Thankfully I had applied enough in advance that I could rectify it by providing a doctors note (an alternative acceptable form of proof). I’m lucky my doctors surgery are great and provided the letter within two days so just in time for our visit. I have since been told by friends that if you still have the reference for your 2019 Ride Access Pass you can use that as evidence and get it converted to a new Pass (worth confirming in advance with Legoland though if you intend to try this!). There is absolutely no way we would have gone if we didn’t have the Ride Access Pass. Even with it you might end up queuing for short periods and when we did last year Rex either ended up crouched down rocking with his face covered or biting his/my arms. I can't overemphasise how important the Ride Access Pass is as the only way Rex is able to access and enjoy this day out; very grateful to Legoland for supporting such a good scheme.
Collecting your Ride Access Pass - Ok I'll admit I felt less grateful when I was in the midst of this particular aspect of the scheme! Last time we visited collecting the pass was awful and it was still frustrating on this occasion. This time the queue was only 30 mins though so better than last year's 50 mins. Its just annoying and ironic that you provide evidence online in advance that your child is unable to queue and the first thing you have to do upon arriving at the park is queue for a Ride Access Pass... Still, the Pass is so good generally that its well worth sucking up this initial queue. If you’re with more than one adult I’d suggest someone takes the child off for a wander in the gift shops and to look at the Lego statues near the entrance.
Keep your Ride Access Pass – they’re now valid for two years at Lego Land, Thorpe Park Resort, Chessington World of Adventures Resort and Alton Towers Resort. My immediate thought was this wouldn't be of any use to us but as I said earlier I'm beginning to challenge that view and we might just try another theme park at some point.
How the Ride Access Pass works – at the start of 2020 Legoland changed their Ride Access Pass to use Reverse Queuing' in line with other Merlin theme parks (so I've read, as you know by now we haven't been to any other theme parks). It basically means you use a website/app on your phone to book a place on a ride, which you can take immediately and after having been on it you then have to wait for the length of the queue. I love this system as it feels really fair. You don’t get to queue jump (despite what a few annoyed other visitors suggested) because you will have to wait the same amount of time as everyone else. It simply means you can do that away from the physical queue, for Rex that meant finding a quiet spot and staying there in between rides whilst we were 'queuing'. You can see via your phone a countdown to when your 'queue time' has finished and you can go on your next ride.
When we visited last year we ended up queuing for a short period (15mins max) to get on the rides even with a Ride Access Pass. This was so a member of staff could scan the Pass app on your phone to register that you’ve entered the ride and then find an appropriate slot to filter your family unit from the Ride Access Pass queue into the (near) front of the main queue. On this visit however most of the rides we went on didn't have a member of staff fulfilling this function (or they were but were doubling up doing other jobs too so didn’t see us waiting). Therefore there was no-one to filter us into the main queue. This was very uncomfortable as several times people in the other queue refused to let us join and I ended up having to explain that Rex is autistic and we have a Ride Access Pass. I didn’t like having to do this, especially not in front of Rex. His personal information and the reasonable adjustments the park make are not something we should have to explain or justify to strangers but I felt I had no real choice in this situation. The alternatives were to turn around and not go on the ride or enter into a disagreement with strangers without explaining our apparent queue jumping. Both of these scenarios would have caused tension and upset Rex significantly. Twice people made comments about how he looked 'fine' and didn’t seem disabled. Rex didn't hear these comments and I chose not to engage because I didn’t want to ruin our day but it wasn’t a great position to be put in. Rex and I are generally fine about people knowing he's autistic and we're usually quite happy to talk about it openly but not like that in a way that involves telling strangers the things he finds difficult. The situation made me very uncomfortable but would have been much worse for a child (or parent) who were not comfortable talking about a diagnosis or medical condition. I suggested to a member of ride staff that if Legoland don’t have sufficient people to cover that role at the moment (which is understandable as they’re doing additional tasks like extra cleaning, counting at shop entrances etc) I think they should consider putting some temporary signage up along the lines of ‘Please let groups with individuals with additional needs join the queue here – they also have to queue for rides just in a different location’. It might make those awkward conversations I had to have a little easier
The Rides!
We tried a few new ones this time, partly because some were closed because of covid19. I’d suggest checking online in advance on LegoLand Ride Availability. I didn’t and Rex was really disappointed when we arrived and found that Deep Seas Adventure his favourite from last time wasn’t open (I think it is now). He enjoyed all the rides we tried except one, so a specific heads up on that The Dragon rollercoaster. The first part of the ride is going through the castle and is a full sensory experience – in addition to the expected lighting and sounds there was also a strong blast of heat and a pungent smell. I didn’t know this in advance so hadn’t warned Rex about it. Unfortunately he was just processing these as the actual roller-coaster started (the first he has ever been on). It was quite literally a physical and emotional roller-coaster for him and he took a bit of time afterwards to calm down. On a happier note he loved Laser Raiders where you shoot at targets whilst on the Ancient Egyptian themed ride and the 4D Ninjago ride. Miniland was still a big hit and we went back there several times between rides and for our lunch. It's a relatively calm space, in comparison to the rest of the park, so great to recover for short periods.
Staff:
The staff were wonderful. Really friendly and helpful. Very happy to chat to Rex about the rides, the rules and what to expect. We forgot our sunflower lanyard but from observing them with others its obvious they knew what it meant. I was impressed last time by the staff and they were equally as good on this visit.
Legoland Map
I pride myself on being pretty good with maps. I spent years reading maps of the countryside and woodlands as a forest ranger and more recently relied on them to navigate unfamiliar cities when travelling with work but LegoLand’s map absolutely stumped me! I can just about use it now after a third visit. So if you haven’t been before invest some time in checking out the map before hand! Also be warned there are no paper copies. There's a few large ones scattered throughout the park but you’re best off downloading it on your phone or doing as I did and take a photo of the one by the main entrance. Be warned though between checking the map, taking photos and using the Ride Access Pass your mobile battery is likely to disappear incredibly fast! I took a portable battery charger this time and even with the top up my phone battery was still dead before we left the park.
Sensory Processing:
Rex was exhausted by the end of the day. We were there for just under five hours and that was enough.
When I suggested leaving at 1600 Rex didn’t argue despite knowing the park wasn’t closing for two more hours. He was dragging his feet on the walk back to the car and was fast asleep within a few minutes of starting the engine. We deliberately took it easy and didn’t rush around. I’ve found it’s easy to get caught up into packing as much as possible in to the day (especially when tickets aren’t cheap) but that's what causes melt-downs and an unhappy child and mum. So nowadays I always try to consciously accept before getting there that this is meant to be a fun day and for that to happen it needs to involve down time too (I find this can make days out with other families tricky sometimes as they like to whizz around seeing everything, which is great for them but doesn’t work at all for us.) Legoland has a great Sensory Room that is perfect for getting some down time in between rides but sadly because of Covid19 it was closed on our last trip. I always think that any visitor attraction that chooses to use a space to provide a sensory room instead of another income generating café/shop should get a big thank you and lots of credit. Its a simple thing that can make such a big difference to a family visit.
So in summary with the right mindset, advance planning and a Ride Pass LegoLand can be a really great day out. Admittedly my theme park experience is very limited but even so I think LegoLand should be congratulated (especially their staff on the ground) for creating such an inclusive positive environment. We will most definitely be back again!
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